Chemo Hair

There are a lot of things I don’t recognize about my life right now. As I think back over the past 6 months it feels like everything has turned upside down and twisted itself inside out. I look in the mirror and see my face with thinning eyelashes and eyebrows – I did manage to keep some of them during this. 🙂 With the right makeup and a wig I can look more normal but I feel like I am hiding what is underneath. I have adapted to the bald look…I appreciate that I have a nice head…I hate the stares from strangers because I have chosen to not cover it up. It takes courage to walk out in public as a bald woman, knowing you didn’t choose this but it happened none the less.

Yes, while I have adapted to the bald look it is still not me…and right now my life feels just as foreign as my lack of hair. It has been forced upon me and I don’t recognize myself in it yet. But my hair is growing. I imagine my life coming back to me much like my chemo hair. I want to go from bald to luscious flowing locks in an instant – not that I had that to begin with. 🙂 That is not how it works. Instead, I check every morning to see how my peach fuzz is coming along. Did it grow any longer? Did it get any thicker? It will come in grey and probably kinky. A far cry from my brown stick straight strands before. Eventually, with time, my hair will settle into a new normal. My life will settle into a new normal that I can’t predict now…I will just check in with it every morning and attempt to be patient with the process.

If you’re curious about how the hair grows back this is an interesting video. I love this girl’s smile and the fact that she documented this…I am probably a couple weeks before she started filming.



6 thoughts on “Chemo Hair

  1. ooh be patient and soon you will be able to feel the wind in your hair again I’m sure of it! that video is very interesting, thanks for sharing/posting.

  2. What a great video this women did! I just fell upon your blog through Ciel’s posts. So many young women with this horrible disease!

    My hair is just coming back in now too… I finished chemo July 10th this year… and my hair is coming in grey right now 😦 Hoping it is just the first bits that will be like that.

    I hope that you are coping well and finding your footing each day… this roller coaster is difficult on the best of days.

    Since we are pretty much at the same timeline (I was diagnosed Jan 2012), feel free to email me if you need to chat. My email is on blog.

    All the best to you xo

  3. What a fabulous video. It is wonderful to know that the chemo is being washed from your body and it is recovering. You will be beautiful no matter how your hair grows back!

    Love you,

  4. I thought of you when I read yesterday’s My Utmost for His Highest devo. It said “A river is victoriously persistent, overcoming all barriers. For a while it goes steadily on its course, but then comes to an obstacle. And for a while it is blocked, yet it soon makes a pathway around the obstacle. Or a river will drop out of sight for miles, only later to emerge again even broader and greater than ever. . . The river of the Spirit of God overcomes all obstacles. Never focus your eyes on the obstacle or the difficulty. . . . stay focused on the Source.” You have been – and are – facing obstacles, but you are going to come out “broader and greater than ever!” 🙂

  5. So glad I found your blog. I have grown just enough hair that you cannot see my scalp. I was diagnosised in February of this year. It is hard to find other women our age going through this crazy journey. Hope you have a great week.

  6. Reblogged this on Burning Brightly and commented:

    Last September I wrote a post about how I didn’t recognize my life or myself in the mirror. I wasn’t sure how my hair would return after chemo…often it can come back completely different than it was before. In a strange way I challenged God that if my hair came back differently then my life would also be different. If it came back the same then my life would look similar. I’m not sure what he thinks when I come up with these things…they sound pretty ridiculous in hind sight.
    But, my hair has come back better than it was before! It is the same texture but a richer color and a bit thicker. I am thankful and I also have hope that my life will follow the same path.

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